a hand in The Hague

Language is a funny thing. For many it is about being correct, for many others about being understood. Somewhere in between these positions,  a sea of misunderstanding can unintentionally be created.

I have brought my children up bilingually. The speak Dutch and English. Every now and then they say something which, grammatically or linguistically speaking, is not correct – but I know what they mean. I too am bilingual. Do I correct?, or do I encourage communication? When my son is ‘corrected’ in his English class because he used holiday instead of vacation … do I make a fuss, or do I take a moment to share that different people will use slightly different words to say the same thing, and what we have to listen to is the individual, the context, the whole, before we judge, correct, improve, let alone ‘understand’.

Language is a funny thing. It can simultaneously build bridges or create crevasses between people – the vessels of communication. ‘Incorrectly’ used, according to the linguists it may lead to misunderstanding. Creatively used, according to the culturalists, it could lead to moments of discovery. When asked to define an ‘island’ my son chose to say that this was a ‘land that was lonely in the sea’. He used his bilingualism, as well as multiculturalism to define something we ‘know’. He could have said, that an island was a land not connected to another piece of land ….. or surrounded by another land ….. to define what we ‘know’. Instead he came up with a definition which inadvertently leads to questioning, discovery … communication and interaction. Is he wrong? Literally speaking, no. Is he right? well …. can you define an island as lonely? Dialogue and discussion is created by the ‘creative’ use of language. Communication is achieved. Message is clear. An island stands separate, solitary as a piece of land at sea.

For some time I have been wondering, what does/should a copywriter blog about …. well, this was a no-brainer …. even if ‘mistakes’ are made, according to the linguists, these ‘mistakes’ may just encourage communication, dialogue and that is, after-all, what a copywriter wants to do: achieve a dialogue between those we write for and those they, in turn want to to reach.

So, even if I am not 100% correct in the use of my language, know that as a copywriter, I have another purpose.

There has been a girl boy, pre-teen power struggle going on in my household of late – the battle ground: Justin Bieber, a (in my terminology) teener bopper who has girls worldwide doing what two generations before them did for the Beatles.  When the discussions started both of my cherished offspring were in the same camp (ergo, so was I – though I had no idea really who they were talking about) – it was easier to be part of the possee than lead another. When I found out this new young star was Canadian, and from a town I know well – I had some nationalistic pride – but must admit seeing my children actually agree on something overrode even THAT.

And, then, it went all haywire ….. my daughter, perhaps taken over by the power of hysteria of millions of others (“hey, am I missing a boat here?” ), started clamouring to attend his recent concert in Rotterdam – BUT we were somehow supposed to do this without her brother knowing for she knew full well what was in store if he found out. I stalled, put off, made excuses and before you knew it, it was too late to get tickets! To then offset the ‘you are the worst mother, ever’ accusations, my middle ground was , okay, we’ll go to the movie ….. I said middle ground, not high ground!

I had heard such negative commentary, from son and daughter, than I actually cringed at the thought of doing this – but, a promise is a promise (and every parent knows how that can backfire on one …..). So, today, without giving too much information (any in fact) to my son I headed off with my daughter and a friend of hers to the movies to see “Never Say Never” ….. earlier negativity was such that when I found out my daughter had invited a friend, I thought – GREAT …. you guys go see the movie and I will use WiFi in the lobby and get some work done …. Ha, no chance, a promise is a promise and apparently (and here is where language/bilingualism/translation played a role) by promising to take her to the film, I in fact implicitly implied I would actually be there – not at the cinema, but at the film. ‘A promise is a promise’.

There were 5 of us, total, in the cinema – me and four young female audience members who, by the way, knew the text of each and every song played! Did I feel old …. actually not. I felt young and nostalgic,  smiling inwardly, and outwardly, at the passion and enthusiasm (and yes, even the seriously over the top enthusiasm) of the young female fans captured and portrayed in the film. I smiled because I thought: how great that they have such passion; how blissfully sublime that they can cry real tears of excitement, emotion, out of this world euphoria for a ‘boy on  stage’!  I smiled because his story of success was not the result of discovery from above – from record producers, magnates and the like – no, his success is because his fans – on YouTube and Twitter in particular were the ones who woke the magnates up! What a great story!

Will he ‘last’? Did generations before us – when they saw fainting women before Beatles concerts think they would last? Who knows – and seriously, who cares? As one mother in the film said: she wanted her daughter to have the thrill she had had when she went to see Michael Jackson when she was young – when no-one could have envisaged what he would achieve, as an artist. Does it matter if he lasts? When all is said and done – it is about what he gives his audience, his fans: a moment of out of this world euphoria which cannot be explained! – and one of which they are a part! one fan admitted to tweeting him 100 times, in one day!

That he is Canadian, was brought up by a ‘teen’ mother and loving grandparents, is a gifted untrained musician, is athletic and active, says a prayer with his crew before every performance and has (so far) been kept grounded are the gifts that I, as a parent take away. If my daughter and millions of others claim to love the person who also has these characteristics – does it even matter if his music will last? He is here, now, and giving young girls world-wide something they can look back on – a memory of emotion. Will they be happy as adults that their emotions were shared?….. agh, that is their problem, much later in their lives. For NOW they are living life fully, and are able to do so because of a young Canadian boy called Justin Bieber …..

PS – there is a lot of ‘new’ music out there today – Justin’s I can live with better than other forms – so even as a parent, I can connect with my daughter – perhaps not the hysteria, but at least I am not yelling “turn that garbage off” ….. and I may even have convinced my son (who as any young blooded male is simply jealous), that JB is not all that bad .. I mean, he did manage to get Snoop Dogg, Boyz II Men and Usher among many others) to his concerts and entourage! That did ring a bell with my son

Today, March 8th, is International Women’s Day – more specifically, the 100th year in which we are commemorating it. This day was established in 1911 by the United Nations to draw attention to the situation of women, the inequality of their situation and the acknowledgement of their contributions to society. 100 years on and the need for this day is still, more than ever, necessary. In so many countries women continue to be at the short end of the stick and more importantly continue to have their human rights violated, their dignity denied and their opportunities restricted. In today’s increasingly globally intertwined world women are on the one hand recognised as the potential motors for positive change, yet are simultaneously confronted by additional challenges which undermine their efforts. On a global scale, that is the situation.

On a personal level, I have just returned from a trip to the US where I had the honour and privilege of commemorating another 100 years. That of my great Aunt, my children’s great Grand Aunt, a woman who has herself overcome, confronted and risen above the challenges women face(d). She did this not on a grand world scale, getting herself into history books and the like – rather in her own quiet, committed, dedicated and personal manner. She was among the first women to operate computers while working with BOAC (British Overseas Airways Corporation, now BA) in New York – rising in the office from Secretary to Office Manager and Bookings Agent. She witnessed soldiers returning from the war, traveled on planes which are a far cry from the aircrafts we now travel in, never married yet cared for her siblings children whenever she could, lived with her sister until her passing, and has always been the constant in the family. She shared some secrets with me this past visit, which have to be an essential part of why she is still with us.

• Acceptance: accept the differences in others, respect them, and avoid unnecessary conflict.
• Be penny & pound wise: buy what you need, save for what you may need and share with others what they need.
• Have faith: whatever the religion have a guide to comfort and advise you, know you are not alone.
• Be curious: learn and keep learning for without education there are no opportunities.
• Don’t let others tell you what you can or cannot do, know that you can, prepare, retrain if need be and do it!

This is a woman who for the first time, this year, had someone else do her taxes! She still lives on her own, follows her own advice and granted us, her family – three generations of it – the opportunity to learn first hand what 100 years of being a woman is. This is a woman whose own curiosity and drive to learn is still actively present. She was not intimidated by being presented with an opportunity to play the piano on an iPad – she was not even phased. With all the change she has witnessed, been a part of, she had learned to accept (and teach us) that it can be no other way. It was my children who had trouble digesting the fact that the computer she worked with took up a whole room – and not a small one!

Thank you Aunt Daisy for giving me, a woman, the chance to witness and truly understand why International Women’s Day is so vital and still so needed.